Although Bourke Accounting has suspended Bill’s Bourke Book Club, we still hold a weekly staff meeting (the conference table is huge, there aren’t that many of us and we seat stagger). After business is satisfied, we sit around the table and chat.
Last week, we got into the subject of relationships and I recounted my own break-up experience. I once had a significant other who told me that I was the love of his life on New Year’s Eve. By 10 AM on New Year’s Day, I was walking to the subway, alone and freshly dumped. It was a definite “It’s not you, it’s me” scenario: You deserve better, I can’t handle a relationship right now, I’ll always love you, yadda, yadda, yadda.
Two weeks later, he was dating a yoga instructor/dominatrix.
Being dumped is no fun. No matter how successful, good-looking and smart you are, as soon as your lover walks out the door for the last time, you begin to question your own worth. There is the endless cycle of “why wasn’t I good enough?” or, the always useful, “what does s/he have that I don’t?” Even Howard Hughes, who was worth something like 11 billion dollars, seemed to go further off the rails when Katharine Hepburn discarded him (Celebritynetworth.com).
Much like Elisabeth Kubler Ross’ stages of grief, there are stages of processing break-ups, too. Once the depression wears off, we have good old-fashioned anger. Sometimes it’s as benign as wishing bad things to happen to the ex. Of course, sometimes it’s as detrimental as making bad things happen to the ex. But we’re not savages here, so let’s not talk about cutting brake lines. Some of us might feel guilty for wishing ill on our former beloved. However, I believe these naughty thoughts can be forgiven. After all, when one is left, one feels rejected, embarrassed, confused and, most importantly, hurt.
For example, after our break-up, my ex called me. His girlfriend had given him mono, was responsible for him being arrested for receiving stolen property (if someone asks you to hold 17 laptops, don’t) and left him for a Planet Fitness spin class teacher. Hearing this, I felt a spark of pleasure – it was a petty and cheap pleasure. How was it possible that I could find happiness in the tragedies befalling this person I claimed to have loved?
And it was right after that that I came to another milestone in the post-dump drama: indifference. I didn’t want him back, I no longer wished him harm, I no longer wished him well. I just didn’t care. It took a while for me to get to that point, but it felt nice. I had missed him and pined for him, but I hadn’t even noticed the first day that I didn’t think of him at all.
Relationships are bizarre. I have come to believe, though, that even after the worst relationships, we are a little smarter. Whether the love affair lasted two weeks or two years, we learn something important. It could be to recognize red flags in others (or ourselves), it could be to become more sensitive. No romance is a waste of time.
No offense, but our Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers don’t want to have a summer fling with you. However, Bourke Accounting experts are loyal and will work hard for your success. You will never have to worry about indifference regarding a Bourke Accounting pro – they’re just not made that way.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue H.
Driving home from Bourke Accounting, I saw a maintenance crew. There was a guy standing at the edge of the road with a sign that read “Slow.” I watched as a few motorists came within inches of clipping him. His face remained passive and he didn’t step back; I wasn’t sure that he was even aware of how close he had come to peril. I gave him a wide birth and a cheerful wave. His expressionless apathy made me think that the Department of Public Works might be ground zero for the zombie apocalypse.
According to Ziprecruiter.com, the average salary of a Louisville Public Works employee is around $31,195. When you consider that workers must contend with both the elements and crazy drivers, it seems a bit light. So, I started thinking about other really rough jobs.
1) Telemarketers. A lot of us have worked telemarketing, which is why we don’t do it now. I understand that telemarketers are annoying – they tell you that the warranty on your Cadillac is about to expire (you’ve never owned one), they tell you that you won that sweepstakes you entered (you’ve never entered one). Telemarketers call during the worst times and don’t take no for an answer. However, these people, according to Indeed.com earn, on average, $13.98 an hour and are treated to the upmost in vile language and abuse. I don’t care how irritating an unsolicited call is, there is still a breathing human on the other end of the line – let’s at least show our quick digit dialing friends a modicum of respect.
2) Roadkill Removal Specialist. This job is exactly as stated. These are the tireless people who clear the road after one of our furry pals has gone, via Michelin, to the great beyond. Much like road construction workers, these people have to deal with weather and distracted drivers. They also have to deal with biohazard, stench and insects. According to Jobmonkey.com, it can be a lucrative occupation if one is paid per animal (about $72,000 a year). However, generally the hourly rate is around $15.00. Sorry, but that wouldn’t remotely pay for the around the clock therapy that I’d require.
3) Resurrection Men. Back in the long-ago, medical students needed to learn the inner workings of fellow humans. Because most of Europe only allowed dissection of murderers who had been put to death, there was quite a demand for fresh bodies. Resurrection Men, or body snatchers, filled this niche nicely (Wikepedia.org) by obligingly digging up the dead for study. While it wasn’t legal, the authorities didn’t press serious charges if a Resurrection Man was discovered, as they believed that young doctors had to learn somehow (Owlcation.com). However, if a family member caught one of these fellas, the Resurrection Man could easily become the specimen.
I could never work in the above job fields; office work has made me soft and I’m all right with that. I don’t have the thick skin to handle telephonic abuse and I would suffer dehydration from crying if I had to clean up dead Thumpers every day. I think that we should take a second to commend the people in our world who are doing the tough jobs (we should probably leave out the Resurrection Men, though).
Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers have a tough job, too. Sometimes Bourke Accounting experts have to be the bearer of bad news. At times, Bourke Accounting pros must decline a client’s dubious request. Through it all, our Bourke Accounting specialists offer the utmost in professionalism and skill. Basically, if Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers were digging up bodies, every Med student in the world would be set for life. Um, but maybe we should just let Bourke pros stay in the office.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue H.
On an average Bourke Accounting workday, I’m up by 4:30 AM. I don’t leave the house until 7:30, but I like drawn-out, non-rushed mornings. I sit on my back porch, drink coffee (I just bought some nice chicory) look at the moon, plan out my day and, um, yeah, smoke cigarettes.
I know, I know, I know. Cigarette smoking is about as retro and attractive as heading off to the opium den – and just as healthy.
I’m not a stupid person (usually). I am aware of the risks presented by smoking. I know the toll it takes on teeth and skin; I know about the myriad of internal organs negatively affected by the filthy habit. I also know that smoking isn’t a good look at work. For example, Bookkeeper Christina had a question for me the other day. Annnd I was out enjoying a smoke. While Christina was understanding, it made me feel bad that I wasn’t there when she needed me. Also, Bill doesn’t really like the smell of smoke. If a staff meeting is on the schedule, I make sure to get my cig in at least a half hour beforehand, as Bill becomes nauseous when exposed to the lingering aroma of Marlboros (and if you’ve ever met Bill, you know he can be quite vocal when displeased).
So, I pay around $6.00 a day to dodge my boss and rearrange plans. That six bucks also provides me with lovely fits of wake-up coughing and bucolic wheezing on hikes. Finally, my (new) car smells like a wet ashtray and there are gray smudges inside and out. What am I doing here?
For most smokers, sucking up that gentle cocktail of formaldehyde and arsenic isn’t just a convenient way to get that nicotine-addled monkey off our backs; instead, smoking is a way of life. Hungry and dinner is three hours away? Smoke. Sad? Smoke. Happy? Well, you get the point. It doesn’t matter if we picked up the habit decades earlier while attempting to look cooler or more mature, the reality is that we are now hopelessly addicted.
Smoking simply isn’t good for us. However, considering our current situation, smoking is more harmful to us Marlboro People than ever before. It’s no secret that “smoking suppresses immune function in the lungs” and increases the risk of influenza (Scientificamerican.com). Since the Coronavirus attacks the lungs, we smokers have put ourselves behind the eight ball before the game even started.
I love smoking, I always have. I am a natural born smoker. As much as I love it, I think now is a good time to kick the habit. Obviously, undoing the years of damage is going to take a minute, but after 24 hours without a smoky treat, the risk of heart attack is greatly diminished (Healthline.com). In addition, after two weeks, lung function can increase by as much as 30 percent (Healthline.com). I don’t know how I’m going to do it yet – and I guarantee that my co-workers will hate me, as I will be difficult – but it’s time for me to give up the ghost and the smoke. Although Rome wasn’t built in a day, I’ve grown tired of burning it down every single day. Fellow Smokers: wish me the greatest of luck, please.
The customer is always right. If you walk in smelling of Philip Morris’ sweet, sweet adulterated tobacco leaves, you won’t receive dirty looks from your Bourke Accounting bookkeeper or tax preparer (not even Bill!). While Bourke Accounting wants you to be healthy and happy, our great guidance doesn’t extend to your personal habits. Bourke Accounting offers the very best in financial services, and we want to be able to provide that to you for many years to come.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue
I never thought I’d say this, but I miss Bill’s Bourke Book Club. Ever since the current situation started up, our book club meetings have been adjourned. While it’s true that Bill’s choices are on the self-help side of the spectrum, the books include a lot of naughty words and some vaguely sexual language. Basically, I can relate to the books because they read like a drunken conversation you’d have with a smart stranger at a house you’ll never find again.
Because my parents were culturally and artistically permissive, my book and music selections were never restricted. In short, I didn’t feel the need to rebel (not in that arena, anyway). As a result of my upbringing, the concept of censorship was alien to me. When I found out what “censorship” meant, I was appalled and confused. This isn’t genius psychology, but even I knew that if you tell someone not to do a specific something, the forbidden activity becomes more attractive.
For example, in 1989, 2 Live Crew’s third record, As Nasty as They Wanna Be, was released. Later that year, it was banned. After that, it went Double Platinum. It was not a good record, and yet, it became 2 Live Crew’s best seller. So, if it wasn’t good, how could it have been so popular? The simple answer is that a prohibited apple tastes so much sweeter – even if one must endure bad cadence, a lack of rhythm, cheap samples and playground lyrics.
The most glaring problem with censorship is that it is purely subjective. Take, for instance, The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger. I read this book when I was 12 and I didn’t feel very traumatized when I was finished. I enjoyed it very much. However, this book, written in 1951, has been banned as recently as 2009 and was listed in the top ten most frequently banned books in schools and libraries, according to the American Library Association (Blogs.bl.uk). While it is a story about a sad, disenfranchised and lost young man, one sticking point was that Holden Caulfield liked to swear. We’re not talking about pure gutter language, but Holden did enjoy a GD here and there.
The biggest problem that censors had with this book was the fact that Holden Caulfield was an intelligent, well-to-do young man, attending an elite boarding school and yet, he still wasn’t happy. Holden’s parents cared little about his mental well-being and seemed more concerned about what the neighbors would say about his “erratic” behavior. When Holden’s brother passed away, his parents were more interested in attending parties than assisting their son to process the loss of his brother.
Basically, this book was banned because it was an indictment against distant and cold parenting. Also, Holden’s nihilistic viewpoint was scary in a time of economic advancement, happy kids and the end of war. What did these kids have to be upset about? This book was banned because it showed that treating kids like another new car or appliance was going to cause problems later.
No, I don’t like censorship. When reading something that I don’t agree with, I still enjoy that people have the right to air an opinion. If we live in an echo chamber that merely repeats our own ideas, we don’t grow. And if we’re not growing, well, then, I think we know what happens.
Your Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers are not big on censorship. If you don’t agree with what your Bourke Accounting pro is doing, they want to hear your ideas. Bourke Accounting experts don’t want you to follow blindly because they happen to sit on the other side of the desk. Your opinion is welcomed and needed. We’re here to grow and change – what works for one might not work for you. We want you to be comfortable enough to speak your mind.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue H.
I’ve told you how much your Bourke Accounting professional likes you. And, at Bourke Accounting, we hope you like us, too. I hate to bring up a sore subject, but if you think about it, the relationship you have with your bookkeeper or tax preparer can be compared to social distancing – you keep me safe and I keep you safe. Your financial expert trusts that you are telling the truth and you assume that your expert is telling you the truth.
This is just the natural way in a civilized society, but after reading The Kiplinger Tax Letter the other day, it would appear that some of us just don’t know how to behave.
For example, Kiplinger reported in their 4/17 newsletter that a tax preparer was recently barred from ever preparing tax returns again and must pay $545,000 in restitution to the US Government. Why? Because this gentleman decided to prepare returns that included “phony business income and expenses [and] education expenses” (Kiplinger, Vol. 95, No. 8). In addition, the gentleman then charged a larger fee because of these much bigger tax refunds (Kiplinger). A legitimate tax preparer will offer an upfront price – your refund amount shouldn’t have anything to do with accounting fees.
And then you have clients like Mike Sorrentino (“The Situation”), a reality television “star” from The Jersey Shore. This guy, along with his brother, “intentionally failed to inform [his accountant] about the true income amount” (Don’tmesswithtaxes.com) he received from his MTV show. In addition, Sorrentino gave his tax preparer a list of business expenses that weren’t quite right. Basically, “The Situation” bought a whole lotta stuff for personal use and thought: Well, shucks, I need this for my business, sort of. According to Forbes, these false returns “defrauded the IRS out of between $550,000 and $1.5 million.”
Gregg Mark, the accountant, pled guilty to filing fraudulent returns, agreed to work with prosecutors and avoided jail time (“The Situation” received 8 months in jail). When Gregg Mark admitted his fault, he explained that he filed false returns “to reduce the taxes owed by the Sorrentinos” (Accountingtoday.com). I don’t know if Mark is still able to prepare returns, but he has a Linkedin page, so that’s a little scary.
Was Gregg Mark trying to be a “bro” when he filed fraudulent returns? I mean, according to his profile, Mr. Mark has been an accountant for 33 years (no, I’m not including a link). After 33 years, you’d think an accountant on the up and up wouldn’t do illegal things in order to curry favor with a 30-something with a dubious claim to fame.
If you have any bookkeeper or tax preparer worth their salt, you’d better be prepared to furnish proof of dependents, business expenses and income. If your financial professional doesn’t require these things from you, as Gregg Mark has shown, there will be one more person on the prosecution’s side if things go sideways.
Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers are not your “bros”. They won’t file fraudulent anything, with or without your knowledge. In a willy-nilly world, the one thing you can depend on is a wholly transparent relationship with your Bourke Accounting expert. Your Bourke Accounting pros can protect your financial interests better than a Teflon vest, but you wouldn’t ask them to take a bullet for you now, would you?
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue H.
I like words. Sometimes, at Bourke Accounting, I think I drive Bill a bit mental. It’s too simple to say, “Man, that guy’s a jerk.” Instead, I must label said jerk as an “invertebrate reprobate” or something else with too many syllables and a high chance of mispronunciation (I speak quickly so most people don’t notice). Bill will shake his head, ask why I have to make things difficult and walk away, sometimes muttering about crazy receptionists.
Because I like words, and because I like to make easy things difficult, I’m always interested to learn the backstory of well-known, everyday phrases. I get a charge when discovering that familiar idioms originally meant something completely different or have very dark true meanings. Hey, some people like to gamble, dance all night or play chess. I get off on this.
So, here are a few of my favorite phrase origin stories:
1) Cat Got Your Tongue. There are a couple of different versions of the truth with this one. For example, one explanation suggests that the phrase came from the English Navy’s use of the Cat-o’-nine-tails whip. When the whipping of some poor punished sailor was finished, the victim was left speechless (Boredpanda.com) – hence, cat got your tongue. Another concept is that, in ancient Egypt, liars would have their tongues cut out and fed to lions (Grammarist.com). Also, there’s the theory that the phrase originated from the Middle Ages, regarding witches: if you happened upon a witch doing witch things, a black cat (her/his familiar) stole your tongue so you couldn’t speak about what you saw (Bloomsbury-international.com). Finally, Grammarist.com is just a party pooper by saying that the phrase is nothing more “than odd, childish imagery.” Whippings and witches are more interesting.
2) Blood is Thicker than Water. While the origin of this phrase is debated, the meaning is not. Researchers seem to agree that the line actually reads: The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. Learningenglish.voanews.com posits that this means “bloodshed on the battlefield creates stronger ties than the water of the womb does.” Basically, the people you choose to risk your life with are closer to you than the people of your family, whom you had no say in choosing. Although we use the phrase to signify that family is more important than friends, the original wording suggests that the intent was just the opposite.
3) Don’t Cut Off Your Nose to Spite Your Face. As far as backstories go, this one is brutal. So, around the year 867, Vikings attacked Coldingham monastery in Scotland. The Nun in Charge, St. Aebbe the Younger, decided that it would be better if the nuns disfigured themselves rather than lose their honor to crazed Vikings. She managed to cut off her nose, her upper lip and scared holy bejeezus out of the Vikings. The nuns were left with their honor intact (the Vikings, did, however, burn down the monastery with all of the nuns inside) (Didyouknowfacts.com).
At the next dinner party, sit me next to the etymologist. Rock stars and FBI agents might have interesting stories, but I don’t think they come close to a person who knows the history of our weird phrases. Our commonly used idioms say a lot about us as a species, after all.
Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers know a lot. Do they know the origins of your favorite phrases? Maybe, maybe not. However, Bourke Accounting pros do know all of the rules to keep you on the right side of the IRS. Your Bourke Accounting expert is always fascinated with learning new things, so if you know the history of a common expression, your Bourke Accounting specialist is more than happy to hear it.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue H.
You know that we are animal friendly at Bourke Accounting. Both Bill and Bookkeeper Christina like dogs. Some Bourke Accounting experts like unicorns, some prefer kitties, some really dig birds. And of course, I want to be a panther. All of these animals, both real and fantastical, are super cool. However, there is one animal that is the stuff of nightmares – swimming around right now – and it’s weirder than anything H.P. Lovecraft ever thought of.
Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce my favorite obsession: The Deep-Sea Anglerfish.
So, what makes the deep-sea angler fish so interesting? Well, as you can see above, this is one frightening looking fishy; between the huge underbite, the needle-like teeth and the weird bioluminescent doodad that hangs from her head, she’s, most likely, not someone you’d like to share a bubble bath with. I am not being sexist by using the feminine pronoun; only female deep-sea anglerfish have the shiny head thingamajig.
Besides looking fascinatingly alien, most of these fish live in desolate environments: 3,000 feet below the surface in the Atlantic and Antarctic oceans (Nationalgeographic.com). Down there, it’s dark and it’s freezing and these weird little guys have evolved to significantly impressive levels. The glowing head lure that the females sport is “filled with bacteria that make their own light” (Oceana.org). This lure attracts “pelagic crustaceans, fish, and other prey” (Oceana.org) way down in the depths.
The female angler is about the size of a football while the male is about the “size of a small finger” (Seasky.org). Nothing strange about that – a lot of species have size discrepancies between female and male members. Male deep-sea anglerfish also don’t have glow sticks stuck to their noggins. Again, nothing odd there, a lot of animals have different appearances depending on sex. The most truly bizarre aspect of these guys is the way in which they mate.
As the little male deep-sea anglerfish gets older, his “digestive system degenerates, making it impossible for [him] to feed on [his] own” (Seasky.org). Well, that seems like a design flaw, right? Flawed maybe, but the boys make up for this short-coming when a lady angler enters the picture. Once the comparatively tiny male finds his sweetheart, he bites her. Then he “releases an enzyme that dissolves the skin of his mouth and that of her body” (Seasky.org). Having done this, the male is now being fed by the female’s blood and, eventually, the male’s “eyes and fins atrophy away” (Wired.com). Oh, but his…um…man parts stay intact (yup, man parts just kind of stuck to the side of her body). This way, when the female is ready to “spawn, she has a mate instantly available” (Seasky.org). The female can accommodate around six males and once you’re hooked on her, you are hooked for life. Sadly, only about “one percent of males” (Wired.com) find true love; the wallflowers are left to die of starvation.
Although it seems like the world is getting strange these days, if you think about it, the world has always been strange – the romantic world of the deep-sea anglerfish is all the evidence required.
Much like my beloved anglerfish, Bourke Accounting pros are adaptable and evolve as our strange world dictates. Whether it’s helping you to navigate your small business relief package or planning for a different economy, your Bourke Accounting bookkeepers and tax preparers are up to date on all of the changes in our new and different world.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See You Soon!
Written by Sue H.
Stimulus Check? More like Stimufuss Check. All right, all right, that was lame. Okay, what about: Stimulus Check? More like StimuNotForUs Check. That was even worse. I’m going to stop trying. But. I do have a point:
There are many problems with the Coronavirus Economic Impact Payments.
This week, a lot of us received our stimulus payment. Please don’t think I’m ungrateful that the government is giving me (my own) money. It was nice to see that “big, fat beautiful check” in my checking account. However, there are a lot of people out there who, so far, have not been as lucky.
For example, the IRS’ Get My Payment tool doesn’t seem to be working quite right. Many taxpayers are noticing that they can’t update incorrect bank account information (CNBC.com). Some who were actually able to update account information have been met with a lovely little message that informs them that their “payment status is not available” (Washingtonpost.com). Finally, people have been “locked out of the system completely” (CNBC.com) and they can’t find out why. But why can’t they find out why? Surely there are customer service representatives at the Internal Revenue Service waiting patiently to help taxpayers, right?
No. No, not at all.
If you were to go to the IRS’ website and click on the “Coronavirus Tax Relief Economic Impact Payments,” one of the first things you will find is this stark advisory: Do Not Call. So, no, there are no patiently waiting representatives willing to help you. However, don’t you worry your little taxpaying head about this! Luis Garcia, IRS spokesperson says the problems “should be fixed now” (CNBC.com).
Besides computer issues, a lot of people who use strip mall tax preparers are finding that, since they “received an advance on their tax refund or had the fee for tax preparation taken out of their tax refund” (Washingtonpost.com), they are going to have to wait for a paper check. This is because the IRS claims that they don’t have these accounts on file. Of course, because someone had to put his name on every check, a lot of these people are going to have to wait even longer for their relief payment. But that someone’s name in the memo line makes it all worth it, right?
And finally, some people aren’t getting credit for their under 16-year-old children and some aren’t getting credit for spouses (Washingtonpost.com). However, on a good note, lots and lots of dead folks are getting their checks (Foxnews.com), so it really balances out.
I understand what a vast undertaking the distribution of these checks amounts to, I really do. However, it seems to me that, perhaps, this whole thing should have been thought out a lot better.
Unfortunately, Bourke Accounting can’t make your Stimulus check come any quicker. If your Bourke Accounting bookkeeper and tax preparer could hold up the IRS and make them correct your bank account information, they would. However, if something goes sideways with your Corona check, your Bourke Accounting expert will make darn sure that you get credit on your 2020 return. Cold comfort, but comfort nonetheless.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. Have a Good Day and See You Soon.
Written by Sue H.
Life has gotten very odd. At Bourke Accounting, people can’t stop to chat when dropping off their paperwork. Smiles are hidden behind masks and there are no more handshakes; everyone seems to be sizing each other up as potential harbingers of plague. However, there is a certain – albeit physically distant – solidarity because we have no choice but to walk the same road together.
The Cooties have changed human life, that much is obviously evident. Besides some of us not being able to work and all of us not being able to enjoy a nice rum and Coke at the bar, there are other changes that I hadn’t even thought about. Also, I wonder what sort of lasting effects we will experience as a result.
So, I present to you a few alterations to our world:
1) Our rats are losing their rat minds. Because most cities have implemented some sort of lockdown procedure, there is not as much sweet, sweet garbage in the streets. When I lived in Brooklyn, the sidewalks looked as though a midnight food fight had occurred; people walking by donated their half-eaten hot dogs and bagels to the concrete. Now that so many businesses have been shuttered and people are staying indoors, the rats are starving. These rats are now fighting, to the death, amongst themselves and eating their young (NYPost.com). Mayor LaToya Cantrell of New Orleans warned that this puts her city’s homeless population at an even greater risk (NYPost.com). Um. Anyone remember the movie Willard?
2) Greetings and Goodbyes. I have a friend who wonders if Corona is going to lead to the death of the handshake. Personally, I’m all right with this – there is nothing worse than receiving the squishy, dead fish handshake of a person you’re only required to spend five minutes with. However, my common sense is at war with my early training – not shaking hands is going against my father’s teachings! I refuse to attempt the elbow bump, as I have terrible depth perception and would either miss completely or elbow an elderly man in the face. And our “goodbyes” have become even worse. Instead of saying, “Have a good day,” it’s become “Stay Safe.” I know the Danse Macabre unites us all, but can we please at least go back to “Take care”?
3) Our environment. It’s probably not surprising that, with everyone staying put, there are already “huge reductions in air pollution” (Newsweek.com). In China alone, since lockdown, there has been a “drop in carbon emissions of an estimated 25 percent” (NYTimes.com). While I realize that our air is going to return to its dismal state once we get back to our abnormal normal, I think this is a learning lesson. Perhaps we ought to really re-think what our routine actions do to the Earth and figure out sustainable ways in which to protect our Home Planet.
We are in the midst of a strange trip. It’s awful and tragic. However, I think this is also a time to put our priorities in order and figure out how we can better ourselves, our wildlife and our world. I believe we are learning what really matters right now.
Is filing your tax return with a Bourke Accounting tax preparer a priority right now? You have until July to file your returns and your Bourke Accounting pro is patient, so maybe not. However, are you trying to save your business and workers with the Paycheck Protection Program? Did you know that your Bourke Accounting expert is willing to guide you through the steps for free? I’ve found that putting food on the table is always a priority.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. HAVE A GOOD DAY!
Written by Sue H.
Sociopaths know the difference between right and wrong; they just don’t care – My Psychology 101 Professor
I don’t lose sleep over what I have done or have nightmares about it – Dennis Nilsen, Serial Killer
We are not sociopaths at Bourke Accounting. In fact, we’re pretty sympathetic towards one another. For example, when an employee’s birthday rolls around, Bill throws a little party and Phil bakes a cake. We treat each other with respect, we help each other out and it’s all very nice and it’s all very civilized.
We spend a lot of time concerned about feelings and the well-being of each other. And sometimes I wonder: wouldn’t everything be simpler if we all just decided to be sociopaths?
The term “sociopath” is actually an outdated moniker that mental health professions shy away from these days. The preferred classification, as outlined in the newest edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (every shrink’s travel guide), is Antisocial Personality Disorder (Webmd.com). However, “sociopath” sounds cooler and I’ll be using it for the duration of this writing.
With movies like Joker and The Silence of the Lambs, we tend to think of every sociopath as a clever and stylish killer. But, as with a lot of things, reality is more mundane than fantasy. So, what is a sociopath, really? According to the Mayo Clinic, a sociopath suffers from a “mental disorder in which [the] person…shows no regard for right and wrong and ignores the rights and feelings of others.” With this definition, it’s easy to understand how serial killers are often diagnosed as sociopaths; they clearly have no respect for the boundaries of others.
However, the majority of sociopaths don’t hit the infamous depths of someone like Ted Bundy. In fact, Health.com cited a study that “estimated that as many as 3.8% of Americans” could be defined as sociopathic. So, if you’re at a party and can’t guess who the sociopath is, well, it might just be you. If you’re not quite sure, Psycom.net has a handy little “Are You a Sociopath” quiz (when I took it, my score said that I had “little to no indication of antisocial personality disorder.” I know, I was surprised, too).
Now, for someone like me, who is still feeling guilty for accidentally killing a spider when I was ten, being a sociopath seems pretty attractive. For example, sociopaths generally don’t feel remorse. Also, they don’t have any sense of responsibility, never hold themselves accountable for anything and basically do what they want when they want (Healthline.com). I’m not saying we should be sociopaths all the time, but we should each get, say, a half an hour a day to be a sociopath (with no casualties, obviously).
As it turns out, I can never be a sociopath. Whereas some mental troubles are organic in nature – you’re either born that way or you’re not – sociopathic people are created. There is no ingrained brain malfunction, sociopaths are simply brought up in really bad households (Psychcentral.com) and the behavior manifests in adult behavior.
Maybe I don’t really want to be a sociopath. Being free from guilt and responsibility sounds awesome, but I’m too used to guilt and feeling that pesky sense of responsibility to change now. Also, I would look terrible in a prison uniform.
We aren’t sociopaths at Bourke Accounting, but it’s okay if you are. Just as we don’t discriminate against tattoos, your Bourke Accounting bookkeeper or tax preparer will still give you the best in financial advice and services – even if you are a gentler Hannibal Lecter. Since the world is mad anyway, Bourke Accounting welcomes all with open arms.
Come see us any time. Our number is 502-451-8773 and don’t forget to visit our website at www.bourkeaccounting.com. See you soon!
Written by Sue H.